There is nothing to tell!
这没什么好说的！

He's just some guy I work with.
他不过是我的同事。

C'mon, you're going out with the guy!
少来了，你们都在约会了！

There's gotta be something wrong with him!
这个男人一定有什么问题！

So does he have a hump? A hump and a hairpiece?
他是驼背吗？戴着假发的驼背？

Wait, does he eat chalk?
等等，他吃粉笔吗？

Just, 'cause, I don't want her to go through what I went through with carl.
我只是不想你重蹈我和卡尔的覆辙。

Okay, every body relax. This is not even a date.
拜托各位 放松点 这甚至不算约会。

It's just two people going out to dinner and not having sex.
只不过是两个人出去吃个饭，仅此而已。

Sounds like a date to me.
听起来像是和我约会。